Monday, November 9, 2009

Strive?

I'm like just a dude that strives for perfection? I've always been among Very different Groups, those that have proven to survive very well in this bull shit.
I've taken a piece of everywhere and harness it. and now i am it. than i realize, I've no personality, since i'm just a piece of various cultures, so i begin searching for my laughs again from my dead cold eyes. Now I've found it and realize again that I'm actually lonely and have no cliques apart from those different"me" i attained, so wtf am i doing?, 18 and pondering about shit every dam night, Indefinitely i thought that maybe i just need more girl friends whom are more sensitive or just a really good relationship with a girl, i think I've found one but my fear of rejection is just getting worse as i'm growing more desperate for a solution to true happiness, and again i'm emoing again now but i will eventually get over it, just sucks man. suicide is a joke. haiz... But actually each time i ponder if my mental is gonna survive it at the end. All my rejections and Breakups Have piled up, maybe its just time to let go.
kel-kel || 8:03 AM